Homey In The Haystack 1999 Synopsis - After Byron Long witnesses a crime, he turns to the Witness Protection Program. They decide he'd blend in perfectly at a traditional Amish farm. He's does his part to raise the barn and help out, but the fine, innocent white virgins on the farm raise a tent pole in his pants. At first, the community thought he was odd, but they soon learn a thing or two about chocolate love, from this tall, dark, and swollen stranger!